National Brother's Day

In honor of National Brother's Day, figured I'd post about my *SECOND* ridiculously-close-in-age-to-me biological son/brother/cousin/nephew (😮‍💨) named Jü$t!ñ 🥰

Obviously, I needed some kind of do-over in terms of “traditionally” having kids; while my baby Moe is a blessing, he *AND* his biological daddy is a MF-ing handful, y’all.

Just growing up with those two had me set for *LIFE* on having any more kids…

But Deranged Male Ancestor had already harvested & was in possession of my baby eggs 🥚😱

#NO, he wasn’t outchea pumping a literal infant with in vitro fertilization drugs--that would’ve been *TOO* wild, even for this dude 🙄😒

Deranged Male Ancestor was trained as a medical doctor & knew that a certain dosage of baby aspirin can induce a cycle or cycle-like event in girl babies 💊🩸

My slightly older genetic twin brother (a.k.a. 'the añt!çhr!$t') somehow got hold of this information &--being the way-too-bright youngster he was--planned his @tt@çk accordingly.

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“How'd a little a$$ boy know enough about menstrual cycles & fertility planning to knock up his own baby sister???,” 

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you might be wondering. 

Well, #NeverForget, y’all: 

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This ñ!g *is* the añt!çhr!$t… he has his ways 😵‍💫 

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My & @ñt!çhr!$t bro’s biological mom stepped up to the plate & tried taking control of the situation as much as she could. Basically, with my genetic material in Deranged Male Ancestor’s hands, I was going to have progeny whether I wanted to or was aware of it or not 😭🥀

Bio Mom’s solution was to search the country for the most suitable gestational carriers/surrogate moms for any embryos resulting from my egg plus whoever’s sperm.

That’s how our relative Mi$@ became my second baby’s mother, carrying & birthing our son Jü$t!ñ 🙂 

Both Mi$@ & her man at the time, S3@ñ, came to me individually *and* together to say just how honored they would be to have & raise one of my egg kids 🥲

Again, I am so ridiculously close in age to Jü$t!ñ that we initially grew up saying we were cousins (#true)… 

Then half-siblings (#AlsoTrue)… 

Then, as adults, it was re-revealed to us that we’re actually biological mother & son 🧬🩸 

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...Talk about a mind-f*çk, y’all 🤯

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Both Jü$t!ñ & Moe cool with me, but they are very, VERY different from one another. Moe is half-añt!çhr!$t so he’s always & forever on 💯, behaviorally-speaking.

Jü$t!ñ’s more chill & reflective, calmly giving off “rich light-skinned” energy. 

Please don’t think having money or being a redbone makes Jü$t!ñ soft, though, cuz baby boy’s not above enlisting his slightly older brother *OR* his two moms to get the party started, ok??? 👊🏾💥

Knowing how our family background throws so-called “regular” people off, Jü$t!ñ will sometimes make one of his eyes wander to the side mid-conversation with someone; the only way to get him to correct it is to (gently) hit him upside the head #LMAO 😂 

He basically be playing the role of an iñbr3d super freak, y’all, it’s mad funny to me 😆

Despite that wayward eye & me stressing to him that *my* life path doesn’t dictate his or Moe’s, my baby Jü$ followed in his biological mom’s footsteps & obtained a whole college degree, y’all 👨🏽‍🎓

I always knew he had it in him to succeed…

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...In spite of the flaming hot mess that is our family structure 🔥🥲

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Eff whatever you thought or heard, followers: !i$@’s eggs are winners, ok??? 🍳

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