#HBD: J. J0ñ3s

Name: J@sm!ñ3 WhateverItsMiddleNameIsWas (*past tense*) J0ñ3s

Birthdate: Deceased 💀

Location: Formerly of the D(M)V Area, specifically Largo/Upper Marlboro, MD

Why they feelin' The Sting today:

Y'all may remember J@sm!ñ3 as recently flambéd h0e Chr!s "Catf*çker" F@rm3r's mürd3r0üs, delusional, h0e a$$ "beauty queen" cousin that looks just like Hottie from Flavor of Love.

That's Hottie, who infamously tried to fry an entire chicken... 

In somebody's microwave... 

After having stuffed the chicken with whole... 

Uncut...

...Carrots & celery sticks, y'all 😳🤦🏾‍♀️

This chick J@sm!ñ3 J0ñ3s is so dense & vain, though, that when you say it looks like Hottie's wild-eyed self, J@sm!ñ3's dumb 🍑 thinks you're calling it "a" hottie 🙄 #wow

Anyways. J@sm!ñ3 will freely admit--in mixed company 👀--to sl33ping with both The Catf*çker *AND* its trashy, weird, incel brother Th3r@ñ (who--at 30+ years of age--had (*past tense*) male bangs & looked (*past tense*) like it kept a booger collection), seemingly out of the goodness of its shriveled-up black heart 💔 

All this nonsense tells me is that nobody on Earth would claim to have messed with these musty, stank 🐈 dudes but someone who’s already related to them 🤮

Disturbingly, J@sm!ñ3's daddy is (former?) P.G. County PD officer Gr3g J0ñ3s. Yet, however Gr3g & J@sm!ñ3's mama G@il raised this thing deep in the heart of P.G. County, M-A-R-Y-L-A-N-D, J@sm!ñ3 basically turned out to be a living embodiment of the certified B!üñt Nug™ saying: 

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"Today's s3xü@!!y-repressed child is tomorrow's next-level pervert,"

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cuz this chick J@sm!ñ3 J0ñ3s is off-the-chain, y'all 😵‍💫

In the year 2025, J@sm!ñ3's still out here claiming titles that 1. Are nearly a decade old, as if they were awarded yesterday & 2. That aren't even rightfully theirs, as a lifelong Maryland resident & scuzzy scammin' s!üt. 

Case in point:

You *fa damn sho* ain't Queen Cici, J@sm!ñ3 J0ñ3s. 

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...What gives??? 🤔

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As mentioned earlier, J@sm!ñ3's a scuzzy scammin' post-mastectomy bra-slangin' s!üt. How fitting that it receive its own dedicated Bee Day post on this, the fourth day of LGBTQ+ Pride Month 2025, cuz it's for damn sure qu33r AF to be openly smashing your incel male relatives... 

While committing vehicular h0m!c!de... 

While (somehow) still remaining firmly on the outside of somebody's prison cell &/or psychiatric facility ⛓️🤨

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Somebody, #PleaseFixIt 🙏🏾🚨

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