St. Patty's Day

One of the first Pats I came to know in this life is the legendary Project Pat of Three 6 Mafia. I wouldn't call Pat a saint, though he do got his own day (March 17) & me & my Irish twins always take said day to celebrate our hood "relatable" family dynamics 🙄🍀 

Me personally, I'd consider Pat more of a hood philosopher, inspiring Chickenheads & RNs across the globe. 

That said, Project Pat still finds himself offensive to a certain type of genderless person--that is: A corny mf with garbage taste in music 😒👎

Whatever 'gh3tt0' (y'all know exactly what I mean) predicament my younger self found herself in--& there were plenty--it seemed my not-so-distant relative Pat from Somewhere Down Souf always swooped into town to save the day. Literally every embarrassing family-related situation that occurred in my youth, Project Pat arrived on the scene already having written a catchy, 🔥 a$$ song about it. 

His spitfire wit, clever & inspirational sayings, & endlessly entertaining round-the-way tales of heartache & redemption lend Pat a certain 'Hood Superhero' quality 🤩

Being raised by my very-C@th0!ic Grandma Sally, though, I wasn't allowed to listen to Project Pat or his music group Three 6 Mafia's magnificent odes to country 'hood life growing up; the media I consumed back then was closely monitored to avoid my "shifting to the dark side" like some (OK, most) of my relatives. 

I actually petitioned my granny to have a convo with our relative Pat about my absolute *NEED* to receive the glorious word of our public housing authority saviors--Pat from the Projects *and* his crew Three 6 Mob--straight to the dome 🎧🎶

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...Obviously, there was some concern. 

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I told Grandma Sally first--then had Project Pat tell her second--that his group only sounds dangerous. That's to scare away the corny mfs who can't appreciate good music. But all the RNs & the Bs that eff with 'em, THOSE the type people Project Pat & friends are tryna reach with their lyrical dopeness. 

"Well, why you got people out here calling you 'Project Pat'?" Grandma asked. "Your mama ain't name you that."

Ever the gentleman, Pat responded that, no, Mama Pat didn't give her son that stage name. In fact, Pat said, he's actually from his mom's uterus first, then the projects. But everybody in the projects he's from calls him 'Project Pat' cuz there's bout 50 million Pats in the world, right? 

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...But only one 'Project Pat', & that's the way it's supposed to be 😌

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"Even his MAMA call him Project Pat, Grandma," I chimed in. "It *might as well* be his real name."

And y'all know this negro Pat is goofy AF; he mighta just messed around & really made his legal name 'Project Pat' by now, dawg 😭 

That reminds me of this time we was at a family function that somebody invited a random snow 🐰 to. Project Pat's a charming guy--& basically, everybody loves a hood n!g. 

Anyways, Pat got the draws & by the time everybody sobered up the next day, Ms. Snow 🐰 was tryna get Pat's real name & digits. 

Pat kept introducing himself to her as 'Project Pat,' but I guess she felt some type of way about calling a Black man that to his face??

Pat looked this chick right in her face & asked calmly AF: 

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"You was calling me 'Daddy' last night, why can't you call me *my government name* 'Project Pat' today???"

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Dawg!!! I think ol' girl literally got laughed out of the function 😂🤣😂

But that's Project Pat, y'all: He's a RN fa sho, & I ain't talkin' bout no registered nurse 😎

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Happy St. Patty's Day, followers 🍀🍻

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EDIT: As for Ms. Snow 🐰, it's not like he asked her to call him sum'n like "Patqueefious." Now that woulda been *TRULY* outrageous...